Annual Domestic Violence Walk set for Oct. 6, 2008 on Lakota Rosebud Indian Reservation

regjoeschmo - I hope your campaign is well-intentioned.

One could easily think its abusers trying to stop justice.

However I read a couple of the related websites - and will take it on face value that you think there are better ways to protect victims and deal with perpetrators (not matter what sex either is).

Sometimes the abuse doesn't leave marks and is one person's word against another.

If these accusations were not taken seriously some smart abusers would injure without leaving marks.

I agree false accusations are terrible and wrong.

I also feel abusers try all the tricks to avoid being caught or facing justice.

only those who refuse to see that gender discrimination is wrong. VAWA is exactly the tyoe of legislation that the ERA would have not allowed, but yet some of the biggest supporters of the ERA also support VAWA...... Ther is alot of corruption within DV courts, and it is not all women who make false allegations, men do it too. To ensure due process is the only way to get rid of the corruption that destroys our children by ignoring true instances of DV. False allegations are crimes of purjury and need to be treated as such.

I am a victim of false allegations, as well as physical abuse. Regardless of proof the courts refused to prosecute. Even though I did not see my son for his first month because of a TRO it is still a necessary precaution. Prosecution of proveable false allegations will help clear up the confusion that gets real abusers off the hook.

PArt of being aware about DV is also knowing the stats are skewed, while many are dropped this does not mean there was no fear of retribution or evidence of a cyclical behavior pattern between both parties. Same as many of the unreported DV cases are women against men. These aspects dont hit the statistics because they are not raw data.

No matter who does it, violence is wrong, and it should be treated with the same additude regardless of gender.

This is my reply to regjoeschmo

There is corruption in some of the friend of the court offices - and also some misguided folks (employees) who are jaded.

The empirical truth is that most DV victims are female - and most allegations are legitimate.

But it is equally true - that males victims of DV - like yourself - get a raw deal.

I hope you removed yourself quickly from the environment.

I am not sure I agree that fighting the VAWA will make things better.

I think promoting the fact there are male DV victims is great tho - as you are doing. It is an uphill struggle and many will look at you with suspicion.

But you know if your heart the truth and I applaud you for speaking out.

You are correct that all violence is wrong and - male and female DV victims should be treated the same.

Both female and male DV victims need more strength behind them and a better chance of justice.

Tho - No amount of justice can heal the wounds.

Too bad there are not home videos made of females who perpetrate DV again men - that would go a long way in opening eyes.

Maybe other males victims can get it on tape.

The statistics do not mirror reality, and all recent studies tell us that in relationshipswomen are just as likely to be violent as men. Problem is when a women gets violent and a man reacts he is charged, this is why so many more women are seen as the victims. State law in Mass states that the police must arrest the person who could do more damage and/or make more money regardless of who is actually commiting the crime. Men also do not normally press charges or even tell people about being victims of DV. When they do so they are shunned.

Just as 80% of all DV cases get dismissed, this does not mean all 80% of them are false. Statistics are flawed in this way and we can only take this issue on a case by case basis. To say fighting the gender biased terminology in VAWA might not be the way to go, but yet you agree gender should not be an issue legally does not make sense to me.

This issue really gets you upset.

I imagine you are going thru the frustration experienced by a female whose story is not believed by the cops & others.

What is you ultimate goal?

Changing the VAWA won't make it any easier for men to be believed.

It also won't make it easier for men to report abuse - as you said they fear being shunned and ridiculed.

And - to be honest - you seem very upset.

I wish there is a way I could send you some peace, calm and serenity.

I wish you well in your effort - because just like a female victim - your words should be taken seriously.

If there are any men out there who are victims of DV - I suggest you secretly videotape the next encounter with your perpetrator - and post it for the world to see.

I have seen lots of videos of men attacking and degrading women - but have never seen a video of an actual male victim being abused.

Unfortunately I think a video is about the only way male victims will be truly believed.

Even your frustration over this issue - could be interpreted as an anger management problem - strictly because you are a guy.

Good Luck!